August 25th
In Order to be a Successful Adult, We Must Wear Successful Shoes

Today I had a footwear-related adventure, and I'm here to tell you all about it!

I thrift-shop a lot. And by 'a-lot' I mean darn near every week. The shop employees know my name, my shoe size, and that unhappy little noise I make in the dressing room upon discovering my butt is too big for a certain pair of pants. They know I prefer canvas or leather boots, and that I find, when I wear moccasins, that my feet look like little potatoes.

But today, boys and girls, I ventured from the thrift shop to DSW Shoes. If you don't know what that is, picture a giant building filled with shoes and happiness and joy and no pain or suffering or sins.

And lawdy-lawd, did I have a successful trip. I bought sandals, and they make me feel like Beyonce. These shoes and I had a cosmic connection, and, instead of making them look like little potatoes, they make my feet look like Beyonce-feet.

And that is a very, very happy feeling indeed.

3 days till music school, where I shall strut my stuff in my Beyonce-shoes. I'm real excited.